2020 the year to forget

Scotty Smith writes daily devotional blogs. The following is part of his December 28 blog and it certainly fits this year: Indeed, your last words from the cross, “It is finished!” are our forever words of peace. Our lives are now hidden in you, rooted in your love, and enveloped in your grace—riches beyond calculation. Dear Lord Jesus, help us to remember your work on the cross and experience your redemption EVERY DAY as we move forward into 2021.

Blood Sacrifices - Hmmmm Sounds extreme. Sounds demanding. Blood smeared over the doorposts in Egypt to spare those inside from the death angel. Most people today know the story. A Roman cross with Jesus held there with nails. Another blood sacrifice. But this blood sacrifice was not for just one nation. This sacrifice was for the entire world. Remember the Garden of Gethsemane? Extreme? Yes Demanding? I'll let you answer that one. Why? What kind of God demands a blood sacrifice? He hates sin (thought, word and deed) SO MUCH but He loves the sinner (all of us) SO MUCH. When I asked Jesus to come into my life God no longer sees me, but the blood of Jesus covering me (His righteousness) like that Egyptian doorpost. A lot of blood is being spilled these days. A lot of pain and anger is being expressed. What does Jesus on that cross have to do with all of this today in 2020? We ALL need to answer that question for ourselves. Accepting HIS blood sacrifice is the only answer. Ryan Turner, thank you for reminding me of this.

Our Gethsemane

What happened in the Garden of Gethsemane between Jesus and Father God? Ultimately after several hours of torturous and agonizing prayer, His will and the Father's converged. This should be for us a time to pause and consider. But we, in the 21st century have become so familiar with His story, that we move quickly to the next plot. At its core Gethsemane depicts the story of an unanswered prayer. Jesus' cup of suffering was NOT removed. Jesus told his disciples "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me." Author Philip Yancey asks an unanswerable question: "Is it possible that for the first time ever Jesus did not want to be alone with the Father?" Other times Jesus had sought to be alone in prayer. How about our own Gethsemane experiences? Of course none of us have been born to die for the sins of ALL of humanity. But, God's call for us to follow Him to the unknown may bring us to places of doubt and fear. I believe that Jesus shows us in His garden experience that agonizing prayer is allowed. In fact as I consider Jesus' bold move forward to Jerusalem and the trial and crucifixion, I feel it was that time of releasing His will to the Father's that allowed Him to say to Peter "...shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?" and later to Pilate "You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above..." There are times to consider the cost. There are times to say, "God I don't want this." Agonize...wait...listen...ask again...further agony. Then, there is the time to think: Will God ask something of me but not give me the grace to accomplish? "Not my will be done, but Thine," Jesus concluded in those agonizing hours in the Garden. Our gardens are holy ground. Find yours. In 2020, many are having Gethsemane conversations with God.

"Advantages" of being poor

I've been given some personal challenging remarks of late, regarding the issues of privilege. Without it, life is unbalanced and unfair to those without it. In a book I am reading, I read this from Monika Hellwig, who lists the following "advantages" to being poor. It relates to to the Beatitudes taught by Jesus. Hellwig wrote: The poor know they are in urgent need of redemption. The poor know not only their dependence on God and on powerful people but also their interdependence with one another. The poor rest their security not on things but on people. The poor have no exaggerated sense of their own importance, and no exaggerated need of privacy. The poor expect little from competition and much from cooperation. The poor can distinguish between necessities and luxuries. The poor can wait, because they have acquired a kind of dogged patience born of acknowledged dependence. The fears of the poor are more realistic and less exaggerated, because they already know that one can survive great suffering and want. When the poor have the Gospel preached to them, it sounds like good news and not like a threat or a scolding. The poor can respond to the call of the Gospel with a certain abandonment and uncomplicated totality because they have so little to lose and are ready for anything. In case you are counting, Monika has 10 "advantages". Don't know if you agree with these but contemplation of each seems to be worth the time and effort.

Yancey's book The Jesus I Never Knew

I'm reading again. Book is The Jesus I Never Knew. What a title. If nothing else could catch my attention, the title should...and it did. What Jesus is the author, Philip Yancey speaking of? It seems his search was NOT for the two dimensional Jesus found on flannel graph boards he heard about as a child. This Jesus was limited by the hands of someone moving him around for the story. And, sometimes Jesus fell off the board if he wasn't carefully placed there. Yeah. I sense the author was in search of the "real" Jesus. And, if all I knew were the sweet stories told to me as a child, I would be searching as well. Yancey asks a lot of questions. Some he answered and I agree with. Other questions were not answered either because Yancey hadn't found the answer at time of writing or he is still on a quest. Regardless, I did find myself agreeing with the "What were you thinking Jesus?" and the many "Why God? questions. Yancey seems to have issues with ALL the silence about THIS SPECIAL LIFE as written about in the gospels. The reader is given some insights into the culture Jesus was born. All of this is helpful because like the flannel graph stories, Christmas cards are lacking. But between Jesus' 12 year old "come and find me Mom and Dad" and John's declaring Him "The Lamb of God", we are left to wonder about who He is. Getting back to me as a reader...I know right away if a book has holding power over my attention. I also know if I am not going to like a book if its messages to me are ones I can't agree with. So, I hit a few spots in this reading that caused me to wonder, "do I continue on...is this worth my time?" I skipped to the last few pages (another technique of mine). And YES. This is a great read! Yancey writes on the final page: "That dark, Golgothan Friday can only be called Good because of what happened on Easter Sunday, a day which gives a tantalizing clue to the riddle of the universe. Easter opened up a crack in a universe winding down toward entropy and decay, sealing the promise that someday God will enlarge the miracle of Easter to cosmic scale. It is a good thing to remember that in the cosmic drama, we live out our days on Saturday, the in-between day with no name --- waiting." 2020 seems to be nothing but one Saturday after another.

Christian communication in 2020

The Apostle Paul was adamant about protecting the truth of the gospel.  Integrity in the new church was critical.  Again and again Paul encouraged believers and leaders to be true to the teachings of Jesus.  Along with this, the apostle told the early church that unity was vital.  The world was watching.

Today, it seems to me that expressing political views has become more important than unity.
Americans and much of the world are polarized about who is right and who is wrong. Try as we may, as Christians, we can't help but be affected about how we see other Christians when their political views are shared.

I have a dear friend who has very different opinions from mine in the political arena.  But this friend is also a Christian.  We are careful when talking to each other to keep our political opinions out of our relationship.  Our friendship is a treasure.  Another dear Christian friend and I also have very different views on some social issues.  We have discussed these differences privately. We've been unable to come to a place of acceptance on these.  Now, our relationship is broken. This being said, I DEEPLY WISH that Christians would begin to stay away from political discussions on social media.  I trust that the truth of the gospel is kept pure by these believers because they seek it through God's Word and prayer.  But we all know that there are different sources in the news media for how politics and politicians and social issues are viewed.  These are to the left views and to the right views.  There are Democrats.  There are Republicans.  There are conservatives and liberals. And in all this, there are the in-betweens and non-commited.  As these differences meet in conversations on issues, feelings get hot.  Tempers rise, angry words are expressed and relationships are changed.  Forgiveness is needed, but often not sought or offered. 

Dumb as a sheep

MAKING IT PERSONAL - The Psalm for this day - Psalm 83...This is how it goes with me --- I start with reading HIS Word and get centered - YES! Psalm 23! Then throughout the day I listen to the crap on TV news, read a lot of crap on social media and by the end of the day I am living Psalm 83 - chastising God (are YOU blind? are YOU deaf?). vv 1-2. Then I tell God what to do - Go get those bad people (scatter them like tumbleweed, like chaff before the wind - disgrace them, etc). THEN comes the personal part "Then they will learn that you alone are called the LORD, that you alone are the Most High supreme over all the earth." v. 18 Right Gini! THEY LEARN...how about YOU LEARN. Dumb as a sheep, I am. But, I do have the Good Shepherd of Psalm 23. Thank you Jesus for your grace and mercy <3

More about confession

I sent the following Email to my dear PBS group:

I've been reading a lot in Ezra the last week or so (assigned reading).  I took notes on my reading and found that reading through an entire chapter at a time was helpful for understanding and context. The major emphasis today is Ezra 10.  He wept and was mourning over the nation's sin.  Then the people all joined him and wept.  Then Shecaniah told Ezra he needed to tell the people what to do.  A plan was developed and it took over 3 months to carry it out. And what did I get from this?  Mourning over our sin, all the nation repenting, and a plan to cleanse the sin. Before this reading I had been convicted about my own bad attitudes because  God said, "Gini, there will be NONE of this in heaven! So, deal with it!"  The best place to start seemed to be --- confess with a list.  It grows and grows and grows.  Psalm 51 is perfect for helping me with this  Some of my confession seems repetitive, just using different words. So I have placed a * by these as "You REALLY have a problem with this sin!"  I'm not proud of my list but humbled by it.  Just wanted to share this insight from God's Word.  Gini

Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee

Here is a little hymn history. It is very relevant to life today: In 1911 Henry Van Dyke published Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee (sung to the music of Beethoven's 'Hymn To Joy'). Van Dyke noted it was to be sung by people who "are not afraid that any truth of science will destroy their religion or that any revolution on earth will overthrow the kingdom of heaven." 

                       Here are the words to stanza 4:
 
"Mortals join the mighty chorus,  
Which the morning stars began;
Father love is reigning o'er us,
Brother love binds man to man.
Ever singing march we onward,
Victors in the midst of strife;
Joyful music leads us sunward
In the triumph song of life."

Sing and let these words encourage your hearts.

Confession

When God gave me a vision and thoughts of heaven and His Throne, He told me, "There will be NO room there for BAD feelings." 

So I began to list my feelings that need to go.  Some are actually the same, but have different wording. The list got longer and longer.  I am NOT proud of this list.  In writing this, I pray that God will bring these to my mind to confess. I will put this list here to remember that I must often confess their return:

(Consider the broader and narrower of these words as well):

resentment, anger, criticism, holding on to hurts, judging, feeling slighted, bitterness, condemning others, comparing, misunderstandings, divisions, jealousy, impatience, ridiculing, suspicion, self-centered, ego, worry, anxious, grudges, lazy, over-ambitious, selfish, complaining, wanting my "inheritance", ungrateful, squandering, superior, pride, feelings of privileged,  
stubborn, distracted, rebellious, joy-less, rebel, harsh, lying, lustful, untrustworthy, defensive

God Bless America

GOD BLESS AMERICA
LAND THAT I LOVE
STAND BESIDE HER
AND GUIDE HER
THROUGH THE NIGHT 
WITH THE LIGHT FROM ABOVE

FROM THE MOUNTAINS
TO THE PRAIRIES
TO THE OCEANS, WHITE WITH FOAM

GOD BLESS AMERICA
MY HOME SWEET HOME
GOD BLESS AMERICA
MY HOME SWEET HOME.

O BEAUTIFUL, FOR SPACIOUS SKIES
FOR AMBER WAVES OF GRAIN
FOR PURPLE MOUNTAINS MAJESTY
ABOVE THE FRUITED PLAINS

AMERICA, AMERICA
GOD SHED HIS GRACE ON THEE
AND CROWN THY GOOD WITH BROTHERHOOD
FROM SEA TO SHINNING SEA.

Unending Amazing Grace and Power of God

Gini Walker

 

 I wrote the following seven years ago and the truth of it still stands and my amazement has even grown.  This difficult year of 2020 brings me to my knees as I consider HIS AMAZING GRACE

July 4, 2013 at 6:21 PM ·

I'm in a state of frustration and awe...I just watched an hour long DVD called Unlocking The Mystery Of Life, challenging the Darwin theory of undirected natural process and natural selection. The viewer is transported into the interior of the living cell, and the DNA molecule that stores instruction to build the essential components of every living organism on earth explained by contemporary scientists advancing the theory of "intelligent design." INTELLIGENT DESIGN? By chance, another name for GOD? Seeing the computerized animation for cell structure sorta led me to awe...and now for my frustration. I feel I live in an era of "Amaze Me"...almost daily, technology offers new and complex smart phones and every thing to go with it. I see and hear people wanting more and more to amaze them. Yet, I look at the evidence of intelligent design in humans and the natural world and universe and still have people tell me they don't want to hear about God, see His name written on our money or public buildings and I'm frustrated! You want to be amazed?!! Open your heart to God and HE will amaze you wilth HIS love and power beyond words to describe. DNA is beyond amazing. The cross is beyond amazing. I will think of that the next time I hear the song Amazing Grace.

HIS Grace and Mercy (our R and R)

May 5 2015

I'm grateful for "My memories" that Facebook keeps track of - sorta like a journal - I find it interesting the memories Facebook chooses...they are happy ones, sad ones and contemplative ones, for sure. Here is one I wrote on May 5 in 2015...Amazing how what we write often relates to life year after year and year:
I wrote this May 5, 2015 ...I do not even remember what was happening and I did not say what it was that caused me to write this. Yet, I am re posting this because it seems in many ways relevant to the lives of some of my friends. So, here it is:
May 5, 2015: "I am amazed over and over by God's timing. I look back at a situation and see His grace and mercy extended to me when I had NO idea what was unfolding. Most of the time I have NO answer to my "why" and sometimes the Grace and Mercy is nearly impossible to see and I feel like I was just taken to the woodshed. Late in life, (slow learner that I am) I've learned God owes me NO explanation. But, this is all especially difficult when something goes TOTALLY "down hill and/or against plans". It seems where my life and the lives of those I love is concerned, I do a lot of shaking of my head and saying, "I don't understand this". So, dear friends, I wish you REST. Renewal and Respite are two of my favorite words. Hope all of you out there feeling VERY, VERY discouraged and alone will in some way find these two R and Rs."                         

I posted this on Facebook and may have posted it here but the thoughts ring true to my heart so I will post again.

Challenging Discussions regarding Race

WHITE PRIVILEGE...I DO NOT like this term.  And I've heard it from blacks who believe in God.  They say that by the mere fact that I am born white I am privileged.  I had nothing to do with the fact that I was born of white parents.  In fact, I was described by someone in my young adult life as having porcelain skin.  I really didn't like that and I worked hard to get tan.

So back to white privilege - Do I blame God for my "white privilege"?  ...and to further confuse this issue for me, I am told that being poor as a white person has no comparison to being poor as a black person.  It just doesn't count when it comes to the subject of race/racism/privilege. This term makes me feel defensive about something I have NO control over.

Someone I know and respect was trying to deal with the term "privilege" in a televised trio discussion regarding racism.  He mis-spoke and somehow used the term blessing instead of privilege.  All hell broke loose and ugly, ugly statements were cast at him.  In an attempt to support him when he apologized publicly, I was called hateful things and told I would go to hell, etc.  I am not the only one who does not like to term WHITE PRIVILEGE but find it nearly impossible to discuss.

So, question...if I am accused of being a racist...does that mean ALL races?  My husband and I have been members of a church that is about 70% Asian; we had a couple get married in our back yard and she is Mexican, one of my dearest friends in our church is German; we've had several couples from India stay in our guest house.  When I try to say I respect blacks and see them as a human (examples - worshiped in an all black church, had a black man on the staff of my church, had black people visit and eat in our home, had black people from Africa stay in our guest house) basically I am told these example of relating to and caring for blacks don't count and that I am still a racist.

I am 75 years old and my getting out into the world of humanity is limited.  So, I read, listen to music and watch TV.  Discussions have often been on social media (Facebook)...this has become a dangerous place to "talk".  There are those who use the hidden aspect of no face-to-face, but just writing words sling their hate.  It feels like those who do this have an agenda to silence others with their strong and hateful words.  I recently read a long blog by a black woman with 10 suggestions for white people: part of her suggestions was to watch black shows and read black books.  Remember the movie "Steel Magnolias"?  The original movie was very, very all white.  I later saw a remake with a total black cast.  I didn't care for it...not because I am a racist.  I just PREFERRED the original.  At that point in time I had not learned or considered seeing life through the eyes of blacks.  I have seen several black movies I liked (Why Did I Get Married and Waiting To Exhale) but these would probably not be what a black woman would have me watch - possibly too ethnic.  I HATE rap music! Not because the performers are black.  I love Andrea Bocelli (sings in Italian and is blind) I prefer Country and Christian songs.  I REALLY like sports.  Some of my favorite players are black.  I especially like baseball and in basketball most of the players are black.  I have one golfer I admire - Tiger Woods---not because he is black, but because he is amazing. All of this said, I feel like I can't like or dislike what I want without having others see it through the colors of race.  Something I recently heard and I'm considering its meaning is that white people have a culture.  I never considered that.  I've always thought of the culture of other races.

Now, regarding talking to our grand children I am told that I am not supposed to say "When I look at others, I don't see color"...well gee, I do see black, brown, etc but their color doesn't matter to me.  Is that better?  Probably not.  This is an area I want to work on - how to talk with Landon and Kyla about race issues.

I am trying to keep my heart open to learning and I recently saw a very short clip with three Christian men (2 black and 1 white) discussing the issues of racism.  This was a good listening experience for me and I want to learn how to see life through the eyes of others.  But here I go again with a challenging remark today about "white privilege"  Basically the attitude is NO WAY can a white person understand what other minorities (blacks especially) feel about how unfair and unbalanced America is in fairness to other races  (and I agree)...this reminds me of my brother Lew.  Lew had a horrific disease that he lived with his ENTIRE life until he died in his 60s.  The pain he lived with was unspeakable.  He told me once that he wanted to drive his fist through a wall because of the pain.  I was very close to him and we had a close relationship.  But if I had one of my BAD headaches when he was around, he would say "I know how you feel".  And, you know what I felt and what I said --- NO! You don't know how I feel!  My pain is my pain and your pain is your pain.  In this life we should never say to another person "I know how you feel"  Although this may sound REVERSED, I feel people of color should not say "you are white privileged and can not know how it is to be of color in America"  True, I can't know. But my color is not of my making/choice.  I was born this way.  Saying I am privileged sounds like God wanted me to be privileged over people of color.  GARBAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I don't feel privileged so even if you tell me how difficult life is for those of color, don't call me privileged.  Is there anyway to get people to understand this?

COMPARISONS  In discussions about race, it is my opinion that we must stop doing COMPARISONS. Example: Many say that poor whites cannot compare to poor blacks.  OK.  To that I say the poor of America (regardless of color) cannot compare to the poor of third world countries.  No doubt this is true.  But, we don't say to poor Americans "you really aren't poor because the REALLY poor live in third world countries"  How thoughtless and cruel.

HISTORY:  Many young people today in America want to destroy emblems of history.  History ISN'T evil.  History tells stories of evil and the results of evil.  But History also tells stories of good.

Memory and Grief

I posted this to a friend grieving the loss of her husband:

The way of grief seems to be a special wiring with our memory...I know what I experienced is NO WAY like what you have experienced but I remember when Brian at age 15 was gone for a year to Australia as an exchange student. Jon Secada's song: "Just Another Day" would hit me SO hard. I knew he was returning but still the words of missing him were almost more than I could bare. 

Marking In My Bible

Do you think of the disciple Thomas as a wimp?  His comment about not believing Jesus was alive until he saw and touched Jesus' nailed scarred hands gave him the name "Doubting Thomas".  I can relate.  When people quote special promises from Scripture about God's love and care I always want to read these words for myself.  Of late I've been on this quest. Today, I found many beautiful words about God and His love and I underlined the words and then put the references in the front of my Bible and marked with a big * and wrote "my assurances".  In these days of turmoil, these words are comforting "I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." Psalm 119:11...Jesus did say, "blessed are those who believe without seeing me."  I don't want to be a doubting Thomas but His Word in my heart and marked in my Bible sure help my trembling faith.  Here are a few of my assurances: II Chronicles 7:14, Jeremiah 3:12, Hebrews 4:14-16, Isaiah 55:6-9, 1 John 1:9, Hebrews 7:24-28, Psalm 63:1-8 +++

Me and Brian

My heart is so heavy this morning...I'm feeling like shouting "ENOUGH!"  Sunday afternoon was our weekly gathering over at Brian and Kelsi's neighbors (gathering spread out on the drive way)  My daughter in law, Kelsi had sent a text earlier in the day asking if we could come early for some private family time.  My response to her was "yes, and I want to give and receive hugs" I didn't know at the time that God was preparing my heart.  Up until then I had been keeping my distance, even with my family - the four of them, just blowing them kisses and hugs.  NO MORE!!!  As I walked up their walkway my son, Brian came out moving toward me quickly and took hold of me and wept and wept and wept as he hugged me.  I talked "mother comforting words" over him and held on tightly for as long as he needed.  This morning Kelsi sent a thank you text saying in all the years of marriage, she has never seen Brian so broken.  It turns out that on Saturday, their neighbor directly across the street collapsed on his walkway and died of a heart attack.  Brian and Kelsi were with him when the paramedics arrived.  The man lived alone and died alone, except for his two dogs that wouldn't leave his side until Brian and Kelsi took them so he could be attended by the paramedics.  Brian wrote on his social media page that we don't know when a touch from a loved one will be the last.  I am so deeply concerned for Brian.  He has been struggling deeply with the closure of his business and isolation.  Yesterday when I was talking to him privately he said, the current situation in America is constantly on his mind.

Brian wrote on Facebook:

Who thinks touch is healing? How many miracles did Jesus perform by touch? In fact, Jesus had a woman touch his clothes to try and get healed.
This makes me reflect on what I experienced yesterday with my neighbor dying. It really shook me up. My parents came over today and the first thing I did, after 7 weeks of distance, was hug my mom and I broke down. Why? For me and my mom it was healing. Who knows, this could be the last time we ever get this opportunity? Do we let that opportunity pass?
For those that know me I used to cut hair. I'll never forget the message given in cosmetology school. You are getting a license to touch people. How many hair stylists out there also double as a therapist? We have a unique opportunity to be a part of the healing process for many.
Why do I bring this up? Keep this in mind. This is not meant to be political. Regardless of motive, we are being desensitized. We are told to stay inside. We are told to keep our distance. We are told not to touch. We are told to cover our face. We are told to stay away from parents and grandparents. We are not allowed to fellowship in our churches or communities. Our salons and spas are closed. The is no more touch.
What is this doing to us inside? What is this doing to our families and the ones we love?
Another neighbor of mine who also lives by herself is scared beyond belief about this virus. She has definitely kept her distance. After the passing of our neighbor the first thing she asks of my wife is what, a hug! Why? Is it healing? Is it comforting? Is that what community and family is all about?
So again, is touch healing?

Pastor Encouragement in Pandemic

Pastor's Note

As we continue on in what has become a much lengthier and challenging crisis than anyone imagined at the start, you might be getting weary and, at times, feel like you are losing heart. I know this describes my experience. Though we probably share much in common, everyone's weariness is a bit different. Some are growing very weary of social distancing, others are weary that they can't distance themselves from those they are quarantined with! Some are growing weary of the stay at home "rules", others are weary of those breaking the "rules". Some of us are losing heart because of an uncertain future, others are losing heart at a more certain "present" as sin and conflict in relationships are revealed. All of us are losing heart as we look back at almost two months of cancellations and postponements. While I am so thankful for how technology connects us, I am growing weary of livestreams and zoom meetings.

In this week's CBR readings, we've been looking at the letter of 2 Corinthians. In Chapters 3 and 4, Paul describes what keeps him from giving up in a world of suffering and difficulty.

He doesn't give up because of the freedom we have in coming to Jesus as we are - nothing to hide. (3:17) In fact, only when we come with nothing to hide (no veil) can we experience Jesus and His transforming love for us.

He is confident in the transforming work of the Holy Spirit who makes us more like Jesus - often most powerfully in our struggles/suffering (3:18)

He doesn't give up because the God who created all things shines the light of his presence into our darkness and suffering. We may not be promised a painless life but we are promised the satisfying presence (the glorious "face of Jesus") (4:1-6)

He doesn't give up because we don't look to ourselves for strength to endure or power to preserve. The power is from God. He keeps going knowing he's only a clay jar - ordinary and unremarkable. It is the gospel that has extraordinary power - especially for those who come to the "the end of their rope". (2 Cor. 4:7-9)

He doesn't give up because he remembers the tension of living in the already-not yet kingdom. Suffering will come but God will not leave us crushed, despairing, abandoned or destroyed (4:8-9)

He keeps going when he is weary because he remembers the death-resurrection pattern of the gospel. The things that must die, the losses we must bear, the pain we will feel will all moves deeper into the resurrection life of Christ - as the life of Jesus is revealed through our weakness and as the resurrection life of Jesus becomes fully ours in the new creation. (4:10-15).

Paul doesn't give up because he remembers he is not living for success, for the approval of others, for the maximum comfort he can achieve in this world but for the glory of God (4:15).

Paul endures weariness remembering tomorrow's grace doesn't "transfer" to today. We need (and are given, even when we don't feel it) day by day renewal of our inner man. (4:16)

Paul doesn't give up as he weighs the sufferings of this "moment" against the incomparable glory of eternity. He focuses on what can't be seen (the really real) instead of the what can be seen (that changes, that fades, that only gives the illusion of a pain free path in life). (4:18)

I wrote all that out for myself! I know a few of you really needed to hear it now and others of you will need it in the future. As we get weary and wonder, "When will it end?" "What lies on the other side of all this?" - we can remember on the other side of any/all suffering, waiting and weariness we endure in this life there is a God who is remaking us in his image and who will one day welcome us into the renewal of all things.

Love in Christ, 
Eric K

Lizards Are One Of God's Creatures

CATCHING A LIZARD - I like lizards. We have many on our property. And that is fine with me - until one gets in our house. Over the years I have caught at least four...and because I do it all by myself (funny that Charlie is never home when I find one) and have done it without harm to the lizards, this makes me an expert! So here is my #1 2020 lizard story. Jackson (our little dog) starts growling and looking at the hallway table. Next to it is a coat rack with my neck scarfs and it appears that is why he is growling. After my attempt to reassure him, I see a lizard, hiding behind the table leg close to the wall. "WHAT TO DO" I ask myself. First, remove Jackson. Next, isolate the lizard and make barriers to keep him in the hallway. This step calls for ingenuity but I did it. Next, get my "lizard bowl". This bowl is a large see through salad bowl that works great because I can pop it over the lizard and also watch him and know he is safe. Next, get a large piece of sturdy paper to place on the floor under the lizard. Now, I can lift up the bowl and carry outside. It didn't go as smoothly as other catches because something fell off the table and scared the lizard who ran toward me and FREAKED me out!...couldn't find him so I decided to have Jackson help me find him. IMPORTANT - leave the barriers in place. After searching the hall closet and living room I found him at the front door. It was as if he knew how he got in and wanted OUT the same way. So, once again the lizard bowl was used...lizard caught, trapped and Charlie arrived just in time to take him outside to the plants. <3

Word Picture of Losing a Loved One

The attending doctor called a couple of hours later and I could not comprehend his words, “Come now. He’s dying.” Even now, six weeks later, those words cut through me; they sear my soul.
The next two hours were without equal in my life. I have never experienced emotional pain and loss to that extent and I pray I never will again. I’ve never sobbed that way - huge, wracking, choking sobs. I was kneeling in the big chair by his bed and leaning over trying to hold him. I kept brushing his hair back from his head and pleading with him to not go. How selfish to beg him to stay here facing so much pain when God was calling him to be pain free and with Him forever.
Shannon came just a few minutes after her dad left us. I was so sad she hadn’t really gotten to say goodbye. If only they had let us stay with him. Chad was in Winchester and didn’t make it until that evening. We just never dreamed that we would be losing him that day. I am grateful that the doctor called me and I was there at what was the end for me but, for Rob, a wonderful beginning.

Second reading of The Harbinger

Yesterday I finished my second reading of The Harbinger.  Because of our current world wide status with The Virus, this reading was challenging.  And, now that I am finished, I am challenged about what I am to do with what I read.  Two messages in the book: RETURN, America to God and be personally responsible for sharing the Good News of Jesus with those I know.

In 2013 I wrote the following on Facebook:

addition remarks on my current reading of The Harbinger by Jonathan Cahn - It has captivated me in a way different from any book I've read - startling amazed at his words. He speaks often of the connection of America and Israel. Two good questions to ask: how? and why? If you are very curious about this but don't want to buy the book yet, I'd suggest you check the web regarding Jonathan Cahn...you can then click on the video of his talk as the key note speaker at the 2013 inauguration prayer breakfast. Riveting is the word I use to describe his 40 minute talk. I also discovered an interesting connection between Ground Zero and the consecration prayer after Washington was inaugurated. Hope I've tickled your curiosity enough for you to check this out

The Three Most Beautiful Words Ever Spoken

THE THREE MOST BEAUTIFUL WORDS EVER SPOKEN - Imagine the satisfaction an artist feels when the last brush stroke is placed; satisfaction an architect feels when the last line is drawn on the plans for a structure; satisfaction a seamstress feels when the last stitch has been sewn on a beautiful garment; satisfaction when an author writes the final word; satisfaction for any creative act, including all of creation. Each of these and any other that may come to mind ends with "It Is Finished" But when Jesus drew His last breath on the cross and spoke "IT IS FINISHED" the foundations of Hell shook and Satan and his demons cringed at the reality of those THREE MOST BEAUTIFUL WORDS EVER SPOKEN. Remember them.

Deep sorrow, seven years ago, after Easter

April 7, 2013   On Facebook, I wrote:

Sometimes my posts feel like emotional roller coasters - the last one was a Goethe quote: "Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it." Today it is focusing on the black hole of depression sucking the life out of dear ones like Rick Warren's son. We grieve with the Warren's as they journey through this unspeakable pain of loss. Just a week ago, they celebrated Easter...They sang with joy. And now they live with sorrow. Oh God, comfort your people.
Rick Warren's son committed suicide, leaving them to grieve and question God.

Depression

DO YOU GET DEPRESSED?  I do.  We are in great company. Look what I found in my quiet time this morning.  One of the best known stories in the Old Testament is about Elijah and the prophets of Baal.  This story is a great read in 1 Kings.  It makes you want to shout YEAH GOD!  Elijah had enough courage to possibly make a fool of himself AND God.  But God did His "God Thing"---Fire from heaven BIG TIME!

This story did not depress me, you may be thinking!  READ ON.  Right after this incredible story, our hero of O.T. History gets depressed and scared This is a great read...and so like God to show us the highs AND lows - not a little but A LOT! Elijah can't function.  He can't eat.  All he wants to do is sleep....What does God do? Does God call Elijah a wimp? Does God say, "I'm done with you Elijah!" The opposite. God ENCOURAGES him.  Elijah thought he was all alone.  God showed him that he wasn't.  God showed Elijah a vast number of His people --- 7,000 who were faithful to God.

                                                           WE ARE NOT ALONE

Easter - Past, Present and Future

My favorite Easter hymn: "The Old Rugged Cross" - Isn't it amazing how believers say "and I love that old cross, where the dearest and best for a world of lost sinners was slain." And how can it be, that MY KING WOULD DIE FOR ME? These two statements stop me in my tracks to ponder the wonder of HIS love... And my son's verse tattooed on his arm is 1 Corinthians 1:18 -"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." Thank you Jesus.

But wait, here comes Easter

Four years ago I wrote this on Facebook...it seems timeless, so here it is for March 2020:

My thoughts about Good Friday (God's Friday) The Cross - It seems that often the cross has become a beautiful piece of jewelry...and I have two: One that is so shinny and has black stones at the 4 ends. The other, (my favorite) is not a polished silver, but has a little purple stone in the middle of the cross bars, a ring around the cross and the inscription on the back: "Robin of Locksley". This morning I read the words of the well known hymn "The Old Rugged Cross"...here are a few phrases - "The emblem of suffering and shame"..."that old rugged cross, so despised by the world"..."the old rugged cross, stained with blood so divine, "To the old rugged cross I will ever be true, its shame and reproach gladly bear"..."the dear Lamb of God (Jesus) left His glory above to bear it (the old rugged cross) to dark Calvary". These words certainly paint a different picture. I wonder if my crosses have weakened the message of this hymn. Maybe not...perhaps when I wear them, a conversation about that "old rugged cross" may begin. Today, is a day to contemplate a cross that was old, and rugged, and blood stained. It held the Creator of the world as He bore ALL the evil of the world...and His Father looked away. But, wait! Here comes Easter!

If I Were God

If I, Gini, were God this would be what I would do:

Here I am in Heaven, watching all the hate and pain caused by THE FALL.  I am SICK of it, so, as Father God, I call for a conference of Father, Son and Spirit.

And I say: "I am SICK of humanity and I want NO more to do with them.  I know I made a promise.  But, if we just wipe them all out - past, present and future, they will never know.  They won't have a memory, They will just be GONE!

Yes, Son, I know You went there and lived with them and tried to convince them.  A few believed and then You died...HORRIBLY.  That was the plan.  But, it has been years and years and years since that happened and now You are here.  Let's forget the plan and the pain.  They just aren't worth it! Let's just have a do over --- totally new planet, no garden, no tree, no serpent---just the Three of Us and LOVE, sweet love,  We can make new humans who will always love us.

Oh----- You're right--- I God, never change.  I am the same yesterday, today and forever.  I never break my word. I am Adonai, El, El Elohe Yisrael, El Elyon, Elohim, El Olam, El Roi, El Shaddai, Immanuel, Jehovah, Jehovah-Jireh, Jehovah-Mekaddishkem, Jehovah-Nissi, Jehovah-Rapha, Jehovah-Rohi, Jehovah-Sabaoth, Jehovah-Shalom, Jehovah-Shammah, Jehovah-Tsidkenu, YHWH

And, I gave them My Holy Word, full of promises and a great love story.  If I destroy all, I will no longer be who I am.  So, people of earth, I LOVE YOU.  I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU."

ABBA

Trinity Family,

As we seek to make sense of the time we are in, where do we even begin? Each day's developments bring new guidelines causing us all to go to our Plan B and then C and then D and then wonder if it's wise to make any plans at all. Our schedules are completely upended, our futures are full of uncertainty and our hearts are fighting anxiety. None of us have ever experienced anything like this. Where do we even begin?

I want to offer a place to start. Just one word. "Abba". As we have been learning, Jesus taught us that this is where all prayer begins; with saying "Our Father". In those two words (one word in the original Aramaic), we grab a hold of God's promise to be with us in our loneliness, to take care of all our needs and to protect us from harm. In this word, we take hold of the unchanging status we have by faith in Jesus as God's sons and daughters and we remember all the rights and privileges that are ours by grace.

Crying out "Abba" is how we can take refuge in the safety of God's good purpose for us and the world. Crying out "Abba" is how we can remember we are heirs to a kingdom that cannot be shaken as sons and daughters (Galatians 4:6-7). Crying out "Abba" is how we break the viral spread of fear in our hearts by crying out to our Abba for all that is broken and groan with hope for our coming redemption (Romans 8:15-25). We cry out "our Abba" and remember we have brothers and sisters who are there for us; we ask for their prayers and we pray for them.

Human Contact During Virus

 Experiencing cocooning During the CoronaVirus
Gini Walker I long to see humans. I was sitting in my quiet spot in my living room and saw an "elderly couple" out for a walk on this gorgeous morning...too late I thought "I should go to the door and say to them "good morning" " I need to be aware of the needs we all have for human contact, even from the distance of front door to street.

Jeremiah's Lamentations

Look what I found! ... About 586 B.C. when Jerusalem was destroyed by the Babylonians, the prophet Jeremiah wrote the book of Lamentations. Webster says that lamenting is crying out in grief, wailing, complaining. Yet, in this sorrowful book I found these AMAZING words: Lamentations 3:22 - 24 "The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness: his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, "The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him!" For ALL of my Facebook friends who may be lamenting, these words are for you and me.

Rules of Civility . A. Towles

I'm currently reading a novel by Amor Towles "A Gentleman In Moscow".  In 1922, Count Alexander Rostov, an unrepentant aristocrat was sentenced to house arrest in Moscow.  During one of his chance encounters, which didn't go well, he had the opportunity of a do-over when given a note which read "Please allow me a second chance at a first impression". After a bit of time with this individual, the Count concludes: "What can a first impression tell us about anyone? Why, no more than a chord can tell us about Beethoven, or a brushstroke about Botticelli.  By their very nature human beings are so capricious, so complex, so delightfully contradictory, that they deserve not only our consideration, but our reconsideration--and our unwavering determination to withhold our opinion until we have engaged with them in every possible setting at every possible hour."

WOW!  I REALLY like this!  In our current climate of intolerance, we could all do well to consider this as we meet, greet and chat with others.

Sorrow in name calling

I wrote the following on Facebook on 2-8-20 and the loving care of friends was amazing...yet, the sting of hate has wounded me.

Well, I've been called a racist, the "great white hope", snowflake and mentally ill, not needing God but a therapist. It is SO sad that over the past week I have tried to have a decent discussion with those of differing political views. I've vowed to myself to keep my remarks non-judging and not personally attacking. But no matter, the mud continued to be slung at me...and it hurts. None of these people know me or my heart and I didn't talk sides, red or blue. I truly feel their agenda is to shut the mouths of those who see issues differently. I thought I could withstand the hate. But I can't. So now I will be silent.

2020 State of the Union

Stories shared about hope, courage, compassion, sorrow, dreams and so much more:

1.  ICE leader who leads in securing our borders
2.  Man who lost his brother killed by a captured and released Illegal protected in Sanctuary Cities
3.  Rush Limbau receiving the Presidential Medal of Freedom
4.  Mom with two young children (Dad returned from battle field and united with them)
5.  Young boy with dreams of going into space program
6.  Mom with her two year old daughter who is a 21 week premie survivor
7.  Single black mom with young daughter who received a scholarship to attend school of choice and
     leave the ineffective  state school.
8. 100 year old military black officer who received stars on shoulders at White House
9.  Husband and Wife who lost daughter who served in Syria the needy and was captured, tortured
     and murdered by terrorist.
10.Grieving mom and young son - husband/dad killed by terrorist
11.Black army vet
12,Venezuelan President Juan Guiado

Constitutional Ways

I've served on several juries.  What a learning and awesome responsibility.  In one particular case the defendant was found innocent, much to the surprise of all in the court.  When I went into the jury room to discuss the case with the other jurors, I thought the individual was guilty but after listening to ALL jurors share and the vote was cast, I agreed with "innocent".

As I watched the impeachment of President Trump process on Monday in the Senate, I felt like I was back in the classroom in a Constitutional Law class.  And as I listened I wished all voting adults in America could be hearing what I was hearing. The future of our beloved Constitution is at stake.  The rights and freedoms of our citizens are at stake.  Future presidential elections and terms in office are at stake.  Regardless of whether or not you are for this president, I pray you will be responsible in hearing BOTH sides as I did as a jurist.

 

Remembering Lew

I want to say "Happy Birthday Lew" because today is his birthday.  But he is now in heaven with Jesus, mom and dad and Caroline and Charlie's brother, Jack and their mom and others.  WOW! Amazing to think of him whole and totally out of pain.  Lew loved our LORD SO MUCH, EVEN THROUGH THE LIFE THAT WAS GIVEN TO HIM.

What a joy it will be to spend eternity with him and ALL saints who trusted Jesus.

True friendship

If there were ever a relationship that shows what a godly, authentic relationship should look like, it would be Jonathan and David’s in the story of 1Samuel 18-20.
Their relationship models four essential principles to forming authentic relationships that we can apply to our own lives today:
1. Be Aware. (1 Samuel 18:1-2)
When Jonathan and David met, they had little in common. David was a poor shepherd and Jonathan was a prince, next in line to be the King of Israel. Yet, in spite of their differences, they became fast friends. They didn’t allow their differences to mask their real selves.
Sometimes we may miss the opportunity to connect with someone because we aren’t from the same social status or we don’t have the same color of skin. We need to be aware that God might bring us the very best friend we’ve ever had in someone who is very different.
2. Be Intentional. (1 Samuel 18:3-4)
And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. Jonathan took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt.
Jonathan took the initiative to be David’s special friend. Since he had the power and position, he made a vow and verbalized that he wanted to be David’s friend. Then he sealed the deal by giving David his clothes and even his sword, demonstrating with his actions that he had set aside his power and prestiges that he would be on even terms with David.
Similarly, rarely do we “drift” into authentic community. Deep friendships don’t “just happen.” God often orchestrates our friendships and the chemistry we have with others, but we have to be intentional about pursuing the relationship. To have a friend, you must also be a friend.
3. Be Available. (1 Samuel 20:4)
Do you have a 2 a.m. friend? This is the kind of friend that will be there for you no matter the situation – even a crisis in the middle of the night.
Jonathan and David definitely had this kind of friendship. When Jonathan’s father Saul tried to assassinate David, Jonathan found his friend, who was in the midst of his darkest hours, and said, “Tell me what I can do to help you.”
4. Be Honest.(1 Samuel 20:9)
At this point in the story, David was literally running for his life. So he frantically turned to his friend for help. He pleaded with Jonathan not to betray him to his dad.
“Never!” Jonathan said. “If I had the least inkling that my father was determined to harm you, wouldn’t I tell you?”
Jonathan loved David enough to deliver him the difficult news. When Jonathan found out that his dad did indeed intend to kill David, he told him.
True friends will speak the hard and uncomfortable truth when we need to hear it the most.
If you long for authentic community, you need at least one friend who will be honest with you when no one else will. This type of friend should have the freedom to speak into all of the significant areas of your life such as your spiritual life, your use of finances, and your relationship with your spouse and kids.
For more on how to experience authentic, godly relationships, check out our True Spirituality series resources.

Written By