Shepherd Words

Pastor Eric K. wrote this is response to an email I wrote about sorrow in my soul.

God's heart is bigger than mine for those I love. In our hands we embrace others with loving concern and sometimes we hold too tight in fear. God is the author of your family's stories and we know what kind of stories He writes for all those who are His. 

"Faith is purified, love is intensified, grace is tasted as we are tested." Don't we wish the testing would be over after x amount of years!! Yet God's love is too holy and strong for Him to stop purifying our trust in Him. 

 

I am praying you run to God for refuge. Sometimes it just seems so hard to do this - but I encourage you to do it. He is altogether and always safe. 

The bumbling, stumbling saints in all our awkward attempts to love are the body of Christ to enfold you and remind you Jesus Christ came to save sinners.

Darkness of the Soul

I wrote this to Pastor Eric in September, 2019

I am in a "dark place of the soul".  I had tears running down my face through most of Sunday morning worship...couldn't stay for Communion.


This relates a bit to your message - the OK goal to set for getting through this life unscathed and desiring that those we love in our family will do the same.  And, yet having that higher goal of obedience to our LORD.


Lately it feels like I am on an emotional and spiritual roller coaster.  Last week God and I had an amazing time together as He worked on my negative attitude.  The details were a "God sighting" that sure lifted my spirits.  Then Charlie shared very soon after that an experience he had and with tears said the same thing: "A God sighting"   It was as if God "showed up" at our house to give us a special part of Himself. 


Then the very next day, the bottom dropped out.  It is amazing what an 8 year old can do to cause such pain in the heart.  A prayer I have been expressing to God is for Landon and Kyla, our grand children.  Sure, I pray over my "list" about them - every area of their lives I can think of.  But, of late I have been saying to God and focusing on: I want MORE THAN ANY THING for His favor and call to faith on their lives, and that they will say YES to Him.  I want more than life itself, to see them in heaven. Before I depart this world it would be nice to see them come to Jesus in faith...but this timing may not occur.


The difficulties with Kyla build and build and my heart hurts and I've been expressing lots of frustration and anger in unrelated areas.  The outbursts of anger are symptoms of unresolved issues.  Anyway, enough of that.  It is just that yesterday was dark.  I finally started to have my quiet time this morning and instead of talking to God, I am talking to you.  I'm probably mad at Him.  But right now, I don't want to participate in our Women's Bible study and I don't want to come to church.  Sometimes I feel like, "why bother".  It is amazing when God "shows" up but these days of silence and darkness are nearly unbearable.


It is sad how family issues affect everyone...right now we (Charlie and I) are feeling at odds with Brian and Kelsi.  It isn't so much what is said, but what isn't said.  Brian and Kelsi have another "child" - a 16 year old niece of Kelsi's living with them, probably for a few more years.  She was in an abusive home situation and ran away to Brian and Kelsi.  It is a LONG and complicated story.  No doubt Landon and Kyla are being affected by this and we certainly are.


I am reminded of Jesus' words in John 16:33 about troubles in this world.  I certainly know the troubles He speaks of are far greater than what I've expressed.  But, if I can't deal with my little troubles, how will I respond to the real ones?  Thanks for being my safe place to share.  Gini
 
 
 
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Yes, God Knows Me...

God's timing and personal work in my life has been so interesting of late.  Yesterday (Sept 16) I had a VERY bad attitude and neck pain occurred late last night and today has been painful.  But I feel God said, "No Gini, we are going to deal with your attitude"  So, I feel He had me stay home from attending Bible study and spend time early this A.M. in bed, talking to Him and listening to Him.  It was so refreshing and needed.

Worship Thoughts

September 17, 2015 at 8:20 AM ·

Today and all of our tomorrows, for your soul and for my soul - "Psalm 62:5-8 "My soul, wait in silence for God only; For my hope is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I shall not be shaken. On God my salvation and my glory rest; the rock of my strength, my refuge is in God. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us."

God Sightings

----- Forwarded Message -----

From: Hugh Steven <hughsteven78@gmail.com>

To: Charlie Walker <walker_c@yahoo.com>

Sent: Tuesday, September 17, 2019, 3:14:26 PM PDT

Subject: You were an Angel

Hi Charlie,

In every way you were God's Angel for me this morning. The circumstances that brought you to my rescue were indeed ordained of God.   I had no idea how I was going to get out of that sofa if it hadn't been for your perfect timing.  So dear friend thank you for being yet again the Lord's instrument of service and blessing.

Blessings,

Hugh

In the Grip of Grace

Someone wrote: "Grace has something to do with patience, with waiting - on other people, on your best intentions or your gut, and on God." When I read this I wondered if there is a grace other than God's. I went to Webster's Dictionary: 1a grace is unmerited divine assistance given man for his regeneration or sanctification and 3a grace is disposition to or an act or instance of kindness or clemency. What I read by the unnamed author and Webster took me back to one of my favorite books: In The Grip of Grace by Max Lucado. He writes "Does God really love us forever? Not just on Easter Sunday when our shoes are shined and our hair is fixed. We want to know how does God feel about me when I mess up, fail or fall short? When I snap at anything that moves; when my thoughts are gutter-level; when my tongue is sharp enough to slice a rock. How does HE feel about me then?" The Grip...reminds me that the God who first made me is strong enough to sustain me. I want to introduce others to HIM. This star-breather, this Shalom, This Holy, Holy, Holy One who raises my head and knows my thoughts before I do is so amazing.

What/Who Do I Trust In?

Heavenly Father, the battle for our heart’s trust is unrelenting. On this August Friday, we affirm that you, alone, are worthy of our worship, love, and trust. But we also want to name your competition. In David’s day it was chariots and horses. In our day, it looks more like this.

Some trust in their goodness, works, and piety. But we trust, alone, in the finished work of Jesus and the gift of his perfect righteousness.

Some trust in a spouse’s affection, a lover’s interest, or their children’s attachment. But we trust in the steadfast love and great delight you have for us in Jesus.

Some trust in stock portfolios, cash margins, and “toys.” But we trust in the immeasurable riches of Christ, and the inviolate treasure kept for us in heaven.

Some trust in beauty, health, or sensuality. But in sickness and health, in our youthfulness and our aging, we trust in the truly beautiful and all-powerful One—Jesus.

Some trust in being smart, clever, and right. But we trust in Jesus, who is our wisdom from God—that is our righteousness, holiness, and redemption.

Some trust in being included. But we trust in the gift of our union with Christ, and the robust communion we enjoy with the entire Trinity.

Some trust in vocational success, a corner office, or their place in the “org chart.” But we trust the One who is making all things new, and our place in your heart.

Some trust in anything that will mask the pain. But we trust in the One who says, “Come to me all who are weary, and I will give you rest.” Only Jesus can fill, heal, and free us.

Father, again we say it: Though many people, places, and things incessantly vie for our hearts and trust, only you are worthy. So very Amen we pray, in Jesus’ beautiful and bountiful name.
Blessings,
Eric K.