More about confession

I sent the following Email to my dear PBS group:

I've been reading a lot in Ezra the last week or so (assigned reading).  I took notes on my reading and found that reading through an entire chapter at a time was helpful for understanding and context. The major emphasis today is Ezra 10.  He wept and was mourning over the nation's sin.  Then the people all joined him and wept.  Then Shecaniah told Ezra he needed to tell the people what to do.  A plan was developed and it took over 3 months to carry it out. And what did I get from this?  Mourning over our sin, all the nation repenting, and a plan to cleanse the sin. Before this reading I had been convicted about my own bad attitudes because  God said, "Gini, there will be NONE of this in heaven! So, deal with it!"  The best place to start seemed to be --- confess with a list.  It grows and grows and grows.  Psalm 51 is perfect for helping me with this  Some of my confession seems repetitive, just using different words. So I have placed a * by these as "You REALLY have a problem with this sin!"  I'm not proud of my list but humbled by it.  Just wanted to share this insight from God's Word.  Gini

Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee

Here is a little hymn history. It is very relevant to life today: In 1911 Henry Van Dyke published Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee (sung to the music of Beethoven's 'Hymn To Joy'). Van Dyke noted it was to be sung by people who "are not afraid that any truth of science will destroy their religion or that any revolution on earth will overthrow the kingdom of heaven." 

                       Here are the words to stanza 4:
 
"Mortals join the mighty chorus,  
Which the morning stars began;
Father love is reigning o'er us,
Brother love binds man to man.
Ever singing march we onward,
Victors in the midst of strife;
Joyful music leads us sunward
In the triumph song of life."

Sing and let these words encourage your hearts.

Confession

When God gave me a vision and thoughts of heaven and His Throne, He told me, "There will be NO room there for BAD feelings." 

So I began to list my feelings that need to go.  Some are actually the same, but have different wording. The list got longer and longer.  I am NOT proud of this list.  In writing this, I pray that God will bring these to my mind to confess. I will put this list here to remember that I must often confess their return:

(Consider the broader and narrower of these words as well):

resentment, anger, criticism, holding on to hurts, judging, feeling slighted, bitterness, condemning others, comparing, misunderstandings, divisions, jealousy, impatience, ridiculing, suspicion, self-centered, ego, worry, anxious, grudges, lazy, over-ambitious, selfish, complaining, wanting my "inheritance", ungrateful, squandering, superior, pride, feelings of privileged,  
stubborn, distracted, rebellious, joy-less, rebel, harsh, lying, lustful, untrustworthy, defensive

God Bless America

GOD BLESS AMERICA
LAND THAT I LOVE
STAND BESIDE HER
AND GUIDE HER
THROUGH THE NIGHT 
WITH THE LIGHT FROM ABOVE

FROM THE MOUNTAINS
TO THE PRAIRIES
TO THE OCEANS, WHITE WITH FOAM

GOD BLESS AMERICA
MY HOME SWEET HOME
GOD BLESS AMERICA
MY HOME SWEET HOME.

O BEAUTIFUL, FOR SPACIOUS SKIES
FOR AMBER WAVES OF GRAIN
FOR PURPLE MOUNTAINS MAJESTY
ABOVE THE FRUITED PLAINS

AMERICA, AMERICA
GOD SHED HIS GRACE ON THEE
AND CROWN THY GOOD WITH BROTHERHOOD
FROM SEA TO SHINNING SEA.

Unending Amazing Grace and Power of God

Gini Walker

 

 I wrote the following seven years ago and the truth of it still stands and my amazement has even grown.  This difficult year of 2020 brings me to my knees as I consider HIS AMAZING GRACE

July 4, 2013 at 6:21 PM ·

I'm in a state of frustration and awe...I just watched an hour long DVD called Unlocking The Mystery Of Life, challenging the Darwin theory of undirected natural process and natural selection. The viewer is transported into the interior of the living cell, and the DNA molecule that stores instruction to build the essential components of every living organism on earth explained by contemporary scientists advancing the theory of "intelligent design." INTELLIGENT DESIGN? By chance, another name for GOD? Seeing the computerized animation for cell structure sorta led me to awe...and now for my frustration. I feel I live in an era of "Amaze Me"...almost daily, technology offers new and complex smart phones and every thing to go with it. I see and hear people wanting more and more to amaze them. Yet, I look at the evidence of intelligent design in humans and the natural world and universe and still have people tell me they don't want to hear about God, see His name written on our money or public buildings and I'm frustrated! You want to be amazed?!! Open your heart to God and HE will amaze you wilth HIS love and power beyond words to describe. DNA is beyond amazing. The cross is beyond amazing. I will think of that the next time I hear the song Amazing Grace.

HIS Grace and Mercy (our R and R)

May 5 2015

I'm grateful for "My memories" that Facebook keeps track of - sorta like a journal - I find it interesting the memories Facebook chooses...they are happy ones, sad ones and contemplative ones, for sure. Here is one I wrote on May 5 in 2015...Amazing how what we write often relates to life year after year and year:
I wrote this May 5, 2015 ...I do not even remember what was happening and I did not say what it was that caused me to write this. Yet, I am re posting this because it seems in many ways relevant to the lives of some of my friends. So, here it is:
May 5, 2015: "I am amazed over and over by God's timing. I look back at a situation and see His grace and mercy extended to me when I had NO idea what was unfolding. Most of the time I have NO answer to my "why" and sometimes the Grace and Mercy is nearly impossible to see and I feel like I was just taken to the woodshed. Late in life, (slow learner that I am) I've learned God owes me NO explanation. But, this is all especially difficult when something goes TOTALLY "down hill and/or against plans". It seems where my life and the lives of those I love is concerned, I do a lot of shaking of my head and saying, "I don't understand this". So, dear friends, I wish you REST. Renewal and Respite are two of my favorite words. Hope all of you out there feeling VERY, VERY discouraged and alone will in some way find these two R and Rs."                         

I posted this on Facebook and may have posted it here but the thoughts ring true to my heart so I will post again.